Baby Liberation Front (BLF)
The initials BLF used to stand for Builders Laborers Federation. This was a corrupt militant union renowned for acts of industrial sabotage.
The initials have been adopted today by another radical group known as the Baby Liberation Front. The chief organiser in Australia is our daughter Margaret (pictured left).
The BLF’s mission is to achieve a better deal for babies. The ambit claim is: cuddles on demand, more breast milk more often, the right to sleep with parents and unlimited feeding entitlements.
Margaret, also known as “pussycat”, has launched a series of wildcat strikes involving fits of screaming and early-morning wake-ups if her demands aren’t met.
She is dismissive of fellow members who don’t follow her lead. Other babies, such as twin brother James, can be easily seduced with bowls of rice cereal or a warm bath, but Margaret is made of sterner stuff. She doesn’t ignore peace offerings. Quite the contrary, she demands them, laps them up, devours them and asks for more.
Margaret is a skilled public performer. Casual observers find it hard to believe that such a sweet face and cute personality can be so manipulative and forceful. It’s not that she’s two-faced; just that she knows how to milk an audience.
Parents of the world need to unite against this new breed of baby terrorism. Giving in to their demands will only see more demands made in future.
We need a think tank to develop strategic responses, especially as Phenergan is no longer available from pharmacies.
I'm a 41-year-old father of four working as a newspaper editor at Mount Gambier in South Australia.
